Embracing Your Core Values
Gaining clarity is an essential part of building a life of joy. Understanding your core values is the first step in doing so. Your values guide your life and when they’re challenged, you feel “off” and maybe a bit untethered. When they’re constantly undermined, you’ll feel resentful, angry, and perhaps fearful or guilty for not speaking up. Over time this cycle of undermined values, resentment, anger, fear, and guilt can play on a loop in your mind and make you feel like there is something wrong with you. If no one else shares your values, are they even valuable?
You might even think, “If everyone else is happy with the way things are, why can’t I be? What's wrong with me?”
Let’s set aside all of the negative self-talk and look at the comparisons for a bit. Who’s to say everyone else really is happy? If you are comparing your daily experiences with what others are choosing to share on social media and in polite conversation, how likely is it that you are getting the whole picture? Could they, perhaps, be editing what they share?
What if, for just a few minutes, this isn’t about anyone but you? What if you focus only on what YOU need?
This isn’t selfishness, it’s honoring who you are. You matter too.
When was the last time you took a good look at what’s really important to you and named your core values? How about writing out a list now? I’ve created a guide to help you.
Now that you have your list of values, what patterns do you see? Which ones are and aren’t being honored by your current circumstances? I’d guess those that aren’t being honored are causing you some issues. If you value honesty but work with someone who is constantly bending the truth, you’re probably not a fan of that individual. If that person is your boss, you might question why you still work there.
If creativity is important to you but you work in an organization that is resistant to change because “this is how we’ve always done it”, you’ll likely feel uneasy. Over time, you’ll probably stop sharing innovative ideas. Worse, if you feel you aren’t appreciated at work, you may start to doubt your worthiness in all areas of life. Bringing that energy home can cause issues for you, your family, your friends, and others you encounter.
Your core values are sort of a shortcut to connecting with your intuition. While they won't get you completely tapped into your intuition, they certainly do help you to start trusting yourself.
You've likely been trained to stop listening to yourself, at least sometimes, and do what is good for others such as your parents, spouse, kids, boss, PTA president, etc. That works for a while, doesn't it? You do as you're asked/told and you get all kinds of external validation. You check the boxes of accomplishment and move up the ladder. But in your quietest moments by yourself, you feel like something's wrong. You realize you've been living for other people and neglecting yourself. You wonder when it will be time for you to shine and do what works for you. You may have even lost sight of who you are and what you want. By taking some time to understand your core values, you take the first step in changing the course of your life. Your core values are your true north and give you guidance in navigating the rest of your life. After all, "if you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there." - Lewis Carroll
So, my dear friend, where are you going and what values are you honoring on your journey? We'll talk about how to get where you want to go over the next few weeks but first, please take a little bit of time to get clear on your own core values.
Have you ever wondered how happy you really are and what you could do to change your happiness level? Get the assessment to find out!
